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fleetingmadnessfor reference for myself and recommendations for you, i'm archiving my favorite fics here. these are the ones from literature, comic books/graphic novels, rpf, and anything else not film or television fandoms. i only mention the length of the fic if it's really long or in multiple parts. if it's not there, assume drabble to decently-sized oneshot.
any dead links are replaced with pdfs. assume i have every fic as a pdf; you want one, just ask. i lost too many good fics relying on ppl not to delete. if i have not made a pdf, it will saypdf.
ARTHURIAN MYTHOLOGY
title: The Water-Horse
focus: Gawain, Bertilak de Hautdesert/Gawain
summary: In the year after the events at Hautdesert, as Gawain tries to reassemble his life, he finds that a few pieces are missing.
link | pdf
A SEPARATE PEACE
title: Two Steps Forward ★
focus: Gene Forrester, Finny/Gene Forrester
summary: And one step back. (Or, Gene and Finny try again.)
link | pdf
THE BOOK THIEF
title: they hugged and cried and fell to the floor ★
focus: Liesel Meminger, Liesel Meminger/Max Vandenburg
summary: A series of oneshots connected together to form a story of what happens to Max and Liesel after the events of "The Book Thief."
link | pdf
DAVID COPPERFIELD
title: Undisciplined Hearts
focus: Ensemble
summary: Twelve drabbles for twelve David Copperfield pairings.
link | pdf
KIDS IN THE HALL; NON RPF
title: Evil Went Down to Get It
focus: Sir Simon Milligan, Hecubus/Simon
summary: Sir Simon Milligan meets Hecubus. Evil ensues.
link | pdf
RPF
title: Acceptable Risk
focus: Charlie Brooker, Charlie Brooker/David Mitchell
summary: Themes of Charlie Brooker's life: late nights in the pub, and masochism.
link | pdf
title: A Little Alan In You ★
focus: Alan Davies, Alan Davies/Rich Hall
summary: "Is there any Alan in you?" "No, no." "Do you want some?" QI S1E10
notes: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
link | pdf
title: And another thing
focus: Charlie Brooker, Charlie Brooker/David Mitchell
summary: Charlie loves the sight of David ranting.
link | pdf
title: Category #2 ★
focus: David Mitchell, David Mitchell/Robert Webb
summary: The birth of This Mitchell and Webb Book.
notes: i literally cry over this like once a week.
link | pdf
title: Charlie Sometimes
focus: Charlie Brooker, Charlie Brooker/David Mitchell
summary: Charlie hasn't slept in three days.
link | pdf
title: Farmers and Ghosts
focus: Stephen Colbert, Amy Sedaris/Paul Dinello/Stephen Colbert
summary: The Second City years.
link | pdf
title: Four Weddings and an Incident With a Donkey That Must Never Be Mentioned Again
focus: David Mitchell, Charlie Brooker/David Mitchell
summary: David and Charlie Do Weddings
link | pdf
title: Heart's a Mess/Won't Admit to It - The Trip 5+1
focus: Rob Brydon (p1), Steve Coogan (p2), Rob Brydon/Steve Coogan
length: two parts
summary: Five Times Rob Kissed Steve and One Time Steve Wished Rob had Kissed Him. (p1) Five Times Rob Tried to Tell Steve and the One Time Steve Heard Him. (p2)
link | pdf
title: I DID Lie to You (But Not About <3ing U)
focus: David Mitchell, Charlie Brooker/David Mitchell
summary: David Mitchell's tiny, insignificant, absolutely-not-a-problem crush on Charlie Brooker takes a turn for the absurd after a Would I Lie To You episode. (aka Aliens Made Them Do It/Mind-Meld fic)
link | pdf
title: It starts with a smile ★
focus: Lee Mack, David Mitchell/Lee Mack
length: 34,255 words in 8 chapters
summary: Lee's been offered the role of team captain on this new panel show, which should be a good thing. But what with Not Going Out losing its ratings and is about to be cancelled, he's not feeling too optimistic. But then he meets the other team captain and things might actually be looking up...
notes: y'all, this slow burn, sugar-sweet thing killed me
link | pdf
title: Laid Bare
focus: Rhett McLaughlin, Link Neal/Rhett McLaughlin
length: 10 chapters
summary: Amnesia fic
link | pdf
title: Later
focus: Robert Webb, David Mitchell/Robert Webb
summary: It's always 'later', Rob thinks.
link | pdf
title: Let me, let me, let me (get what I want this time) ★
focus: David Mitchell, Charlie Brooker/David Mitchell
summary: David listens at doors, panics, and behaves badly.
notes: help me
link | pdf
title: Mindwipe
focus: David Mitchell, Charlie Brooker/David Mitchell
summary: David Mitchell somehow gains the temporary ability to read minds. This is bad news for Brooker, who has been trying to keep his crush under wraps.
link | pdf
title: More Like Bert and Ernie
focus: David Mitchell, David Mitchell/Lee Mack
summary: David finds himself watching an episode of 'Not Going Out'. It wasn't intentional... Honest.
link | pdf
title: My Rascal Davies
focus: Stephen Fry, Alan Davies/Stephen Fry
summary: It's Christmas, and Stephen is faced with an epiphany.
link | pdf
title: Never gonna give you up
focus: David Mitchell, Charlie Brooker/David Mitchell
summary: "I'm envisioning you developing a scoring rubric now," David says. "And carrying around a set of cards with numbers on."
link | pdf
title: Now ★
focus: David Mitchell, David Mitchell/Robert Webb
summary: Some things change. Some things don't.
notes: i'm a good person who does not deserve this. "forgetting nothing" fuck off!!!
link | pdf
title: One More Time With Feeling (or, Charlie Brooker and the Terrible Horrible No Good Very Bad Day) ★
focus: Charlie Brooker, Charlie Brooker/David Mitchell
length: 49,585 words in 12 chapters
summary: December the seventh, 2009. Recording day for the Big Fat Quiz of the Year. Charlie wakes to the sound of his mobile. (Groundhog Day fic)
notes: i want to crush this fic up and snort it like coke. the loveliest of slow burns.
link | pdf
title: The Sensible Fish Swims Down
focus: Charlie Brooker, Charlie Brooker/David Mitchell
summary: Charlie befriends David's fish.
link | pdf
title: Shenanigans ★
focus: Charlie Brooker, Charlie Brooker/David Mitchell
summary: Somewhere near the end of the fourth pint, Charlie finds himself proposing that David be his boyfriend for a while.
notes: FAKE DATING FIC!!!
link | pdf
title: Sleep Tight
focus: Rhett McLaughlin, Link Neal/Rhett McLaughlin
length: 7 chapters
summary: While filming the Spot the Differences video, Rhett begins to realize just how attractive his best friend is.
link | pdf
title: Snips and Snails and Fuzzy Blue Whales ★
focus: Stephen Fry, Alan Davies/Stephen Fry
summary: He doesn't have dimples. Stephen always imagined that if this sort of thing were to happen, it would be for someone with dimples.
notes: so.. much... PINING
link | pdf
title: Some Bad Comedians
focus: Charlie Brooker, David Mitchell, Victoria Coren, Robert Webb, Abigail Burdess, Charlie/David, Charlie/Victoria, Victoria/David, David/Robert, Abigail/Robert
summary: Nine unconnected ficlets. Featuring Charlie Brooker, Victoria Coren, David Mitchell et al. in scenes (very) loosely based on Pulp songs. Nothing quite like playing out the stories of a working class boy from Sheffield with a load of Guardian columnists.
notes: #6 gets its own ★ bc i mean literally fuck off
link | pdf
title: Two Have A Ripping Adventure
focus: Charlie Brooker, Charlie Brooker/David Mitchell
summary: Charlie is adapting the Famous Five for BBC three. There is genuinely accidental sex, homosexuality leading to huddling for warmth, and a cute dog (or three).
link | pdf
title: Why Charlie Brooker's 38-Point Plan to Survive the Zombie Apocalypse is Doomed To Fail
focus: Charlie Brooker, Charlie Brooker/David Mitchell
summary: The plan is falling apart like a house of cards, the points crumbling one by one. It's not because of Charlie himself, or the nature of zombies, or the world in general. No. In fact, it's all because of David Mitchell.
link | pdf
title: You Could Never Be My Woman
focus: Kevin McDonald, Dave Foley/Kevin McDonald
length: 8 chapters
summary: Commentary Transcript: "Isn't the joke that Dave's too pretty?" "Yeah, I was too pretty to pretend to be a man." "But you are a man." "I'n't that funny?"
link | pdf
SENSE AND SENSIBILITY
title: In Primal Sympathy
focus: Elinor Dashwood, Colonel Brandon/Elinor Dashwood
summary: After her sister's untimely death, Elinor finds strength in what's left behind.
link | pdf
SHAKESPEARE
title: bewitched, bothered & bewildered
focus: Twelfth Night, Antonio, Antonio/Sebastian, Olivia/Viola
summary: Men are not a new sensation / I've done pretty well I think / But this half-pint imitation / Put me on the blink Antonio in Illyria -- what led him there, and what took him away.
link | pdf
title: song of songs
focus: Macbeth, Lady Macbeth/Macbeth
summary: "Thy lips are like a thread of scarlet, and thy speech is comely..." Written for Porn Battle XIV, with the prompts: cunnilingus, armor, breasts, red, thighs, bad, possession.
link | pdf
title: this little hand (in yours)
focus: Macbeth, Lady Macbeth, Lady Macbeth/Macbeth
summary: They were once a study of contrasts, she and her lord. She was small and dark, her face an pale oval and kept carefully blank. He was ruddy-faced and boisterous, the king's favorite. When she would put a fragile hand on his broad shoulder, he would stoop down to catch her whispered word.
link | pdf
title: What You Will
focus: Twelfth Night, Cesario|Viola, Orsino/Viola, Orsino/Cesario
summary: If music be the food of love, Orsino is tone-deaf and Cesario, half-starved.
link | pdf
any dead links are replaced with pdfs. assume i have every fic as a pdf; you want one, just ask. i lost too many good fics relying on ppl not to delete. if i have not made a pdf, it will say
ARTHURIAN MYTHOLOGY
title: The Water-Horse
focus: Gawain, Bertilak de Hautdesert/Gawain
summary: In the year after the events at Hautdesert, as Gawain tries to reassemble his life, he finds that a few pieces are missing.
link | pdf
A SEPARATE PEACE
title: Two Steps Forward ★
focus: Gene Forrester, Finny/Gene Forrester
summary: And one step back. (Or, Gene and Finny try again.)
link | pdf
This was something they never talked about. Finny’s fall, Gene’s culpability, their seven-year silence. Finny avoided it because it hurt him to think that someone he trusted, someone he loved (completely, Finny never did things by half) could be capable of hurting him. And Gene wanted, more than anything, to forget that he had destroyed someone he had loved.
But.
Things did not seem so damn precious now, as they had when they were young. Everything, then, had taken on a special importance, a tragic significance, partly because the war that was breathing down their necks. And because of their sometimes-claustrophobic friendship.
Because of Gene’s all-consuming jealousy.
Because of Finny’s deliberate obliviousness.
Finny had thought of Gene as an extension of himself, but Gene had only wanted Finny. If he couldn’t get Finny, he had wanted to be Finny.
It had been strange, a strain, this need they shared of wanting to be inside each other’s skin, and it had ended in tragedy.
(And near-homicide, because Gene, like Finny, just couldn’t do things by half.)
But.
Things did not seem so damn precious now, as they had when they were young. Everything, then, had taken on a special importance, a tragic significance, partly because the war that was breathing down their necks. And because of their sometimes-claustrophobic friendship.
Because of Gene’s all-consuming jealousy.
Because of Finny’s deliberate obliviousness.
Finny had thought of Gene as an extension of himself, but Gene had only wanted Finny. If he couldn’t get Finny, he had wanted to be Finny.
It had been strange, a strain, this need they shared of wanting to be inside each other’s skin, and it had ended in tragedy.
(And near-homicide, because Gene, like Finny, just couldn’t do things by half.)
THE BOOK THIEF
title: they hugged and cried and fell to the floor ★
focus: Liesel Meminger, Liesel Meminger/Max Vandenburg
summary: A series of oneshots connected together to form a story of what happens to Max and Liesel after the events of "The Book Thief."
link | pdf
"I don’t know what to do." He was silent for several moments; he rubbed his face and breathed deeply as Liesel watched, her nails biting into her hands as they clutched into fists on her lap. It was hideous to watch him, to feel powerless against such incredible pain.
"Stay with me." Her voice wavered as she said it; she fidgeted and brushed a curl behind her ear. "Stay here in Munich, just for a few days. With me."
He looked up from his fingers, and there was a hint of a smile. “All right.”
"Stay with me." Her voice wavered as she said it; she fidgeted and brushed a curl behind her ear. "Stay here in Munich, just for a few days. With me."
He looked up from his fingers, and there was a hint of a smile. “All right.”
DAVID COPPERFIELD
title: Undisciplined Hearts
focus: Ensemble
summary: Twelve drabbles for twelve David Copperfield pairings.
link | pdf
KIDS IN THE HALL; NON RPF
title: Evil Went Down to Get It
focus: Sir Simon Milligan, Hecubus/Simon
summary: Sir Simon Milligan meets Hecubus. Evil ensues.
link | pdf
RPF
title: Acceptable Risk
focus: Charlie Brooker, Charlie Brooker/David Mitchell
summary: Themes of Charlie Brooker's life: late nights in the pub, and masochism.
link | pdf
title: A Little Alan In You ★
focus: Alan Davies, Alan Davies/Rich Hall
summary: "Is there any Alan in you?" "No, no." "Do you want some?" QI S1E10
notes: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
link | pdf
The part of Alan's mind that never quite turns off wonders what they would look like to someone watching – a study in contrasts. Rich's craggy face, each line and wrinkle indicating a wealth of life experience, versus Alan, who's been called "fresh-faced" far too often for his liking, and who now makes his living by appearing to be young and stupid. Then, too, their physical postures – Rich is bent down, almost hunched, while Alan himself is arching backwards in pleasure, trying instinctively to get his cock further down Rich's throat. Fucking brilliant, thinks Alan, that's how we'd look.
title: And another thing
focus: Charlie Brooker, Charlie Brooker/David Mitchell
summary: Charlie loves the sight of David ranting.
link | pdf
title: Category #2 ★
focus: David Mitchell, David Mitchell/Robert Webb
summary: The birth of This Mitchell and Webb Book.
notes: i literally cry over this like once a week.
link | pdf
Still chuckling, Rob slings an arm over David's shoulders, hauls him in close and tips their foreheads together. Reluctantly David drops his arms to his sides. He can smell the mints Rob chews when he's nervous.
"Relax."
David's eyes are drawn to the laugh lines at the corners of Rob's mouth. We're getting older, he thinks. Rob shakes him, but gently.
"Relax."
David's eyes are drawn to the laugh lines at the corners of Rob's mouth. We're getting older, he thinks. Rob shakes him, but gently.
title: Charlie Sometimes
focus: Charlie Brooker, Charlie Brooker/David Mitchell
summary: Charlie hasn't slept in three days.
link | pdf
title: Farmers and Ghosts
focus: Stephen Colbert, Amy Sedaris/Paul Dinello/Stephen Colbert
summary: The Second City years.
link | pdf
title: Four Weddings and an Incident With a Donkey That Must Never Be Mentioned Again
focus: David Mitchell, Charlie Brooker/David Mitchell
summary: David and Charlie Do Weddings
link | pdf
title: Heart's a Mess/Won't Admit to It - The Trip 5+1
focus: Rob Brydon (p1), Steve Coogan (p2), Rob Brydon/Steve Coogan
length: two parts
summary: Five Times Rob Kissed Steve and One Time Steve Wished Rob had Kissed Him. (p1) Five Times Rob Tried to Tell Steve and the One Time Steve Heard Him. (p2)
link | pdf
title: I DID Lie to You (But Not About <3ing U)
focus: David Mitchell, Charlie Brooker/David Mitchell
summary: David Mitchell's tiny, insignificant, absolutely-not-a-problem crush on Charlie Brooker takes a turn for the absurd after a Would I Lie To You episode. (aka Aliens Made Them Do It/Mind-Meld fic)
link | pdf
title: It starts with a smile ★
focus: Lee Mack, David Mitchell/Lee Mack
length: 34,255 words in 8 chapters
summary: Lee's been offered the role of team captain on this new panel show, which should be a good thing. But what with Not Going Out losing its ratings and is about to be cancelled, he's not feeling too optimistic. But then he meets the other team captain and things might actually be looking up...
notes: y'all, this slow burn, sugar-sweet thing killed me
link | pdf
David simply smiles at him and the conversation tapers off after that. They walk out of the building together and Lee walks David to the tube station. Once they get there though, he stops just outside. David gives him a questioning look and he smiles apologetically and comes clean about not actually riding the tube home. David blinks.
“I just, we were talking and so I just hopped on so we could continue talking, but I really live in the other direction, and it’s walking distance, so…”
“You idiot," David says, but there’s no heat behind it and Lee chuckles.
“Yeah, usually…”
“Alright then," David says and looks towards the stairs leading down to the tube, but then turns back to Lee again instead. “Want to smoke with me before you head home, then?”
“Yeah," Lee breathes out, oddly grateful for the extra moment. “Sure…”
“I just, we were talking and so I just hopped on so we could continue talking, but I really live in the other direction, and it’s walking distance, so…”
“You idiot," David says, but there’s no heat behind it and Lee chuckles.
“Yeah, usually…”
“Alright then," David says and looks towards the stairs leading down to the tube, but then turns back to Lee again instead. “Want to smoke with me before you head home, then?”
“Yeah," Lee breathes out, oddly grateful for the extra moment. “Sure…”
title: Laid Bare
focus: Rhett McLaughlin, Link Neal/Rhett McLaughlin
length: 10 chapters
summary: Amnesia fic
link | pdf
title: Later
focus: Robert Webb, David Mitchell/Robert Webb
summary: It's always 'later', Rob thinks.
link | pdf
title: Let me, let me, let me (get what I want this time) ★
focus: David Mitchell, Charlie Brooker/David Mitchell
summary: David listens at doors, panics, and behaves badly.
notes: help me
link | pdf
But then he thinks about Charlie, who is funny and brilliant and good company, and who has the most ethereal smile David's ever seen. He thinks about how Charlie might be a little lonely, about how David himself is definitely a little lonely, and how maybe, against all reason, they could be a little less lonely together.
He thinks about the fact that they could possibly have really good sex. Maybe they won't. But they could.
He thinks about the fact that they could possibly have really good sex. Maybe they won't. But they could.
title: Mindwipe
focus: David Mitchell, Charlie Brooker/David Mitchell
summary: David Mitchell somehow gains the temporary ability to read minds. This is bad news for Brooker, who has been trying to keep his crush under wraps.
link | pdf
title: More Like Bert and Ernie
focus: David Mitchell, David Mitchell/Lee Mack
summary: David finds himself watching an episode of 'Not Going Out'. It wasn't intentional... Honest.
link | pdf
title: My Rascal Davies
focus: Stephen Fry, Alan Davies/Stephen Fry
summary: It's Christmas, and Stephen is faced with an epiphany.
link | pdf
title: Never gonna give you up
focus: David Mitchell, Charlie Brooker/David Mitchell
summary: "I'm envisioning you developing a scoring rubric now," David says. "And carrying around a set of cards with numbers on."
link | pdf
title: Now ★
focus: David Mitchell, David Mitchell/Robert Webb
summary: Some things change. Some things don't.
notes: i'm a good person who does not deserve this. "forgetting nothing" fuck off!!!
link | pdf
Fifteen years too late, David kisses back. Now they’re standing by the Thames at a cloudy dusk and, at long last reaching forward, David finds his hand in thinner hair.
“Even fucking stupider now,” Rob murmurs, forgetting nothing.
“Even fucking stupider now,” Rob murmurs, forgetting nothing.
title: One More Time With Feeling (or, Charlie Brooker and the Terrible Horrible No Good Very Bad Day) ★
focus: Charlie Brooker, Charlie Brooker/David Mitchell
length: 49,585 words in 12 chapters
summary: December the seventh, 2009. Recording day for the Big Fat Quiz of the Year. Charlie wakes to the sound of his mobile. (Groundhog Day fic)
notes: i want to crush this fic up and snort it like coke. the loveliest of slow burns.
link | pdf
David snorts, then sits up sharply. "Wait! Have we done this before?"
"Which part?"
"You convincing me to come over, having curry, you displaying your card skills."
"No, this is the first time," Charlie says.
"Well?" David asks.
"Well, what?"
David looks impatient. "How does it feel to be doing something completely new?"
Charlie feels a wave of sudden gratitude that almost knocks him over. He meets David's eyes, tries to put everything he's feeling into his smile.
"Good," he says. "Actually, really good."
"Which part?"
"You convincing me to come over, having curry, you displaying your card skills."
"No, this is the first time," Charlie says.
"Well?" David asks.
"Well, what?"
David looks impatient. "How does it feel to be doing something completely new?"
Charlie feels a wave of sudden gratitude that almost knocks him over. He meets David's eyes, tries to put everything he's feeling into his smile.
"Good," he says. "Actually, really good."
title: The Sensible Fish Swims Down
focus: Charlie Brooker, Charlie Brooker/David Mitchell
summary: Charlie befriends David's fish.
link | pdf
title: Shenanigans ★
focus: Charlie Brooker, Charlie Brooker/David Mitchell
summary: Somewhere near the end of the fourth pint, Charlie finds himself proposing that David be his boyfriend for a while.
notes: FAKE DATING FIC!!!
link | pdf
He has the sudden and disturbing realization that something in the last few years has mellowed him, a little.
When had it happened? How had it happened? The Charlie of fifteen years ago – maybe even of five years ago – would've sneered through all of this family stuff, even if he'd made a perfunctory effort not to show it for his mum's sake. Now it just seems like a basically not-unpleasant way to spend an hour or two, especially with David here.
He'd been so angry then, so defensive, so ready to spit on the idea of happiness. And look at me now, leading my plump middle-class lifestyle. Sunday lunch at mum's and all sorts of telly friends, and a flat full of furniture that didn't even come out of a skip. Even pretending I've got a boyfriend. Christ. For a moment he can imagine what the Charlie of back then would have thought of the Charlie of now; he'd have called himself a cheap sellout and that would've been the least of it. I'd have despised myself for being friends with David, too. I'd have thought him repressed and ridiculous. The thought makes his heart sink.
He only realizes that he's gone actually silent when David reaches over oh so casually and sets a hand on his knee. The thick fabric of Charlie's jeans means he can't actually feel anything but the weight of it, but even so, it's comforting. Just as suddenly as the rush of panic had appeared, it fades. Somehow it doesn't seem quite so bad to have mellowed this far, not if it means he doesn't have to jump for something reflexive and sarcastic every time something nice happens. I'm all right, he thinks fiercely.
When had it happened? How had it happened? The Charlie of fifteen years ago – maybe even of five years ago – would've sneered through all of this family stuff, even if he'd made a perfunctory effort not to show it for his mum's sake. Now it just seems like a basically not-unpleasant way to spend an hour or two, especially with David here.
He'd been so angry then, so defensive, so ready to spit on the idea of happiness. And look at me now, leading my plump middle-class lifestyle. Sunday lunch at mum's and all sorts of telly friends, and a flat full of furniture that didn't even come out of a skip. Even pretending I've got a boyfriend. Christ. For a moment he can imagine what the Charlie of back then would have thought of the Charlie of now; he'd have called himself a cheap sellout and that would've been the least of it. I'd have despised myself for being friends with David, too. I'd have thought him repressed and ridiculous. The thought makes his heart sink.
He only realizes that he's gone actually silent when David reaches over oh so casually and sets a hand on his knee. The thick fabric of Charlie's jeans means he can't actually feel anything but the weight of it, but even so, it's comforting. Just as suddenly as the rush of panic had appeared, it fades. Somehow it doesn't seem quite so bad to have mellowed this far, not if it means he doesn't have to jump for something reflexive and sarcastic every time something nice happens. I'm all right, he thinks fiercely.
title: Sleep Tight
focus: Rhett McLaughlin, Link Neal/Rhett McLaughlin
length: 7 chapters
summary: While filming the Spot the Differences video, Rhett begins to realize just how attractive his best friend is.
link | pdf
title: Snips and Snails and Fuzzy Blue Whales ★
focus: Stephen Fry, Alan Davies/Stephen Fry
summary: He doesn't have dimples. Stephen always imagined that if this sort of thing were to happen, it would be for someone with dimples.
notes: so.. much... PINING
link | pdf
"I'll pick you up at eight," Stephen says, instead of all the things he wants to say, about how Alan was horrible at the game, gleefully bad, betting twenty quid a dance and losing three hundred that night. It's all true, but irrelevant; Alan had laughed and collapsed in a heap in Stephen's car, turning the radio on and bravely suffering the buffeting of Stephen's ineffectual hands. "Eyes on the road," Alan had insisted. "Now, cabbie, second star to the right and straight on 'til morning, yeah?" and Stephen would have driven there, no questions asked.
title: Some Bad Comedians
focus: Charlie Brooker, David Mitchell, Victoria Coren, Robert Webb, Abigail Burdess, Charlie/David, Charlie/Victoria, Victoria/David, David/Robert, Abigail/Robert
summary: Nine unconnected ficlets. Featuring Charlie Brooker, Victoria Coren, David Mitchell et al. in scenes (very) loosely based on Pulp songs. Nothing quite like playing out the stories of a working class boy from Sheffield with a load of Guardian columnists.
notes: #6 gets its own ★ bc i mean literally fuck off
link | pdf
“But we’ll always write together?” David says.
“Until death do us part,” says Rob, rolling his eyes but still smiling.
*
They never split up, but they never marry each other, either.
“Until death do us part,” says Rob, rolling his eyes but still smiling.
*
They never split up, but they never marry each other, either.
title: Two Have A Ripping Adventure
focus: Charlie Brooker, Charlie Brooker/David Mitchell
summary: Charlie is adapting the Famous Five for BBC three. There is genuinely accidental sex, homosexuality leading to huddling for warmth, and a cute dog (or three).
link | pdf
title: Why Charlie Brooker's 38-Point Plan to Survive the Zombie Apocalypse is Doomed To Fail
focus: Charlie Brooker, Charlie Brooker/David Mitchell
summary: The plan is falling apart like a house of cards, the points crumbling one by one. It's not because of Charlie himself, or the nature of zombies, or the world in general. No. In fact, it's all because of David Mitchell.
link | pdf
title: You Could Never Be My Woman
focus: Kevin McDonald, Dave Foley/Kevin McDonald
length: 8 chapters
summary: Commentary Transcript: "Isn't the joke that Dave's too pretty?" "Yeah, I was too pretty to pretend to be a man." "But you are a man." "I'n't that funny?"
link | pdf
SENSE AND SENSIBILITY
title: In Primal Sympathy
focus: Elinor Dashwood, Colonel Brandon/Elinor Dashwood
summary: After her sister's untimely death, Elinor finds strength in what's left behind.
link | pdf
SHAKESPEARE
title: bewitched, bothered & bewildered
focus: Twelfth Night, Antonio, Antonio/Sebastian, Olivia/Viola
summary: Men are not a new sensation / I've done pretty well I think / But this half-pint imitation / Put me on the blink Antonio in Illyria -- what led him there, and what took him away.
link | pdf
title: song of songs
focus: Macbeth, Lady Macbeth/Macbeth
summary: "Thy lips are like a thread of scarlet, and thy speech is comely..." Written for Porn Battle XIV, with the prompts: cunnilingus, armor, breasts, red, thighs, bad, possession.
link | pdf
title: this little hand (in yours)
focus: Macbeth, Lady Macbeth, Lady Macbeth/Macbeth
summary: They were once a study of contrasts, she and her lord. She was small and dark, her face an pale oval and kept carefully blank. He was ruddy-faced and boisterous, the king's favorite. When she would put a fragile hand on his broad shoulder, he would stoop down to catch her whispered word.
link | pdf
title: What You Will
focus: Twelfth Night, Cesario|Viola, Orsino/Viola, Orsino/Cesario
summary: If music be the food of love, Orsino is tone-deaf and Cesario, half-starved.
link | pdf
